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夢見がち拘束具の悲壮な高校デビュー
人は知らないが実は犬の脳は首輪の中にある
正確には首輪の意思が犬の意識を奪うのだ
今日もボクは人に化け手頃な犬を支配する
ボクの手にかかれば因数分解もさせられる
愚かな人類を愛でる
この可憐な相貌は
ボクが授けた仮面とも知らずに
「お手」と差し出したこの手では先刻
2年前の牛乳をこねておいたし
ペロペロ顔を濡らすこの舌では
トンボの死骸をベチャクソ舐めておいた!
同胞とは優秀な犬を奪い合い戦ってる
支配力は受験や就職、出世には欠かせない
ただボクは他の首輪と違う
堕天使に加護されし者
右目に授かりし闇の魔力を見よ……!
チワワにボコられ痰をかけられた
違う!こんなのボクの本気じゃないぞ!
堕天使は今たまたま銭湯に行ってて
魔力はかき混ぜ忘れて固まってる
だけなんだ
違うんだ……
もうじきボクも人でいう中3
気づき初めているんだ
堕天使も魔力も妄想
ボクは特別じゃない
そんな矢先興味の生け花SNSで
屈強なケルベロスと知り合った
彼の力を借りれば 同級生の操る
子犬など一網打尽
チワワにボコられ痰をかけられて
お気にの手袋の指を切られた
すいません 加護も才能もありません
眼帯の下はただのものもらいです
もういい これからは姿を変え
人として生きる バカな奴らだ
堕天使も魔力も信じるだろ
待ってろ!人間界の高校!
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Yumemigachi Kousokugu no Hisou na Koukou Debyuu
Hito wa shiranai ga jitsu wa inu no nou wa kubiwa no naka ni aru
Seikaku ni wa kubiwa no ishi ga inu no ishiki o ubau no da
Kyou mo boku wa hito ni bake tegoro na inu o shihai suru
Boku no te ni kakareba insuubunkai mo saserareru
Oroka na jinrui o mederu
Kono karen na soubou wa
Boku ga sazuketa kamen tomo shirazu ni
"O-te" to sashidashita kono te dewa senkoku
Ni-nen-mae no gyuunyuu o konete oitashi
Peropero kao o nurasu kono shita dewa
Tonbo no shigai o pechakuso namete oita!
Douhou to wa yuushuu na inu o ubaiai tatakatteru
Shihairyoku wa juken ya shoushoku, shusse ni wa kakasenai
Tada boku wa hoka no yubiwa to chigau
Datenshi ni kago sareshi mono
Migi-me ni sazukarishi yami no maryoku o miyo...!
Chiwawa ni bokorare tan o kakerareta
Chigau! Konna no boku no honki janai zo!
Datenshi wa ima tamatama sentou ni ittete
Maryoku wa kakimaze wasurete katamatteru
Dake nanda
Chigaunda...
Mou jiki boku mo hito deiu chuu-san
Kidzuki hajimeteirunda
Datenshi mo maryoku mo mousou
Boku wa tokubetsu janai
Sonna yasaki kyoumi no ikebana SNS de
Kukkyou na keruberosu to shiriatta
Kare no chikara o karireba doukyuusei no ayatsuru
Koinu nado ichimoudajin
Chiwawa ni bokorare tan o kakerarete
O-ki ni no tebukuro no yubi o kirareta
Suimasen kago mo sainou mo arimasen
Gantai no shita wa tada no monomorai desu
Mou ii kore kara wa sugata o kae
Hito toshite ikiru baka na yatsura da
Datenshi mo maryoku mo shinjiru darou
Mattero! Ningenkai no koukou!
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A Collar Dreamer's Pathetic High-School Debut
Humans don't realize, but dogs' brains are in their collars;
To be exact, the collars take over their consciousness
Once again, I'll take human form to control a dog today;
With my guidance, I can even make him do factorization!
Those foolish humans adore it,
This pitiful, lovable face,
Completely unaware it's a mask I put on...
When they ask to "shake paws," I hold one out,
Knowing that it's been dipped in two-year-old milk!
And this tongue with which I wet their face
Has licked a smushed dragonfly's corpse!
My bretheren all compete for the best dogs;
To rule, one must take exams, get jobs and promotions...
But I'm not like other collars;
I have the protection of the Fallen Angel!
Behold the dark magic bestowed to my right eye...!
I got beat up by a chihuahua and smeared with phlegm...
You misunderstand! This belies my true potential!
The Fallen Angel happens to be at a bathhouse,
And he forgot to mix my magic power, so it's hardened...
Yeah, that's all it is...
You've got the wrong idea...
I'm soon to be a junior high senior, as humans say,
And I'm starting to realize...
The Fallen Angel and my magic are just a fantasy...
I'm not anything special...
This led me to a flower-arrangement network,
Where I came to meet a powerful Cerberus
With his power, I'll surpass any collar in my league;
I can sweep up puny dogs with ease!
I got beat up by a chihuahua and smeared with phlegm,
And it cut the fingers off my favorite gloves!
I'm sorry, I have no divine protection, no talents,
And all there is under the eyepatch is a sty...
Enough of this - I'll just change my form,
And live as a human; they're such fools,
I bet they'll believe in the Fallen Angel and my magic!
Just you wait, human high school!