So Chu said she'll finish the thread eventually... but what if I do it????

(Spoilers: I'll probably still take forever, but at least I have a thrilling desire to see this finished, unlike Chu.)

Last time on The Joogle Bros., THE CANNON FIRED AND THE MYSTERIOUS JOOGLE DISAPPEARED. But before we go to the second half of Inhertz:

It's not a glitch, it's fake walls that lead to a Star Egg! So, into the village part.

This guy wants us TO NOT LOSING THE GOLD*. But we can't yet because Mitch makes all his characters like dogs*, which means Joogles can't swim. They just kinda... can't go below a certain depth. Since about half of his galds are underwater, we need the Water Key, I mean what.

(Actually, the villager directly mentions the Water Key. Subtle!)

(Wait, dogs can't swim, right? They better not, I don't think I have any other opportunities to make dog jokes.)

Why would someone be here to say this?

I'm not sure how you're supposed to figure this out without buying Fake Vision or whatever (ahahahaha), but these fake walls lead to another egg. The egg is fully visible, at least.

Wow, what a dam! I don't know what all of the machines are doing here since there aren't any enemies in this area. I guess saving is kind of convenient, but in reality, nothing in Joogle is convenient.

So over here, we press the switch on top of the dam to drop the crate to destroy the other crate to push the BLUE switch to drain the lava in the other half of Inhertz. Why does any of this stuff exist?

Also, some sweet aquatic life that frequently gets stuck in walls and does absolutely nothing. I was really proud of spriting and programming these, which is why I drew that sweet unlockable art of them.

But I AM in Inhertz Village! Well, what it actually means is the other part that's nothing like a village and should really be called Inhertz Valley or something. But why not just walk back instead of using this teleporter? Because we don't know how to program coming in from an alternate entrance so you can't do that.

For those who have photographic memories of Joogle levels, including parts that I don't think are in any of Chu's screenshots, you may notice there's no lava here anymore. For everyone sane, there's no lava here anymore. So we do what would kill us in any other situation and jump off the bottom of the screen.

We end up in the FIRE CHAMBERS, which have Metal Man's music which is the only cool thing about them. By the way, lava looks a lot like water. But that's silly, you can't swim in lava.

Here's a Firebird. It probably has some really terrible name that I forget. It slowly moves toward you and if it touches anything it explodes. GM particle effects, am I right?

After pressing a switch to open a door like one screen away, we run into the Fire Chamber's main defense: SPONTANEOUS FIRES. They intermittently exist and stop existing. And not even in an alternating way with other fires; I'm totally safe on the platform I'm standing on here.

A free Star Egg and silver coin! The boss of this level sure is generous.

When Chu actually played this level (like months after it was made), she complained about having to wait more than two seconds for moving platforms to come near you. So we made BUTTON PLATFORMS that start moving after you step on them. Brilliant, huh?

And after making those platforms, we put in a normal one here anyway. We made a SIGN about deliberately going against Chu's advice.

And wait a minute oh god what is that Star Egg doing there.

Save point? Uh oh. Time to fight FIRE SNAKE.


Donkey Kong 64 - Dogadon

I never actually checked to see if you could get stuck in the blocks when they appear. Probably!

Killing or damaging is my favorite! The tutorial also explains Joogle/Pilid doors even though there have already been a couple of them and come on, how else would they work.

This room (wherever it is) happens to have a WARP TUNNEL to JoogLabs. Time to meet our old friend!

Thanks, Pepsijoogle.

Instead of doing that, though, we can now go to JOOGLE CITY. City of terrible-looking, deformed skyscrapers.

Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga - Beanbean Castle Town

Oh! Sorry, I'm playing Joogle Brothers on my DS.

Yeah, I don't think Mitch cares about the Joogle universe making sense. But he really cares about Earth physics, guys.


This is the hardest puzzle ever because I don't think that red block you have to shoot exists anywhere else. Also, that statue is totally useless.

Also let's talk to nothing up here. I somehow forgot to screenshot it but a test NPC appears and says some horribly unfunny stuff.

Also if you keep walking here you find some fake walls and a switch that I guess does something.

I climbed some clouds leading out of a skyscraper to get a Star Egg. No, seriously, Joogle City is really dumb and there are like 10 Star Eggs here.

I don't think I need to say anything here.

And then I left Joogle City. It's hard to properly explain how absurd and pointless it is without making like a 10 minute video, which I'm far too lazy to do since no one will watch it.

Next time! Same Joogle update delay, same Joogle topic!

Chapter 5