The Story of a Girl Who Lived a Thousand Years Somehow

This is the happy story of a fairy-tale girl who loved macarons and lived a thousand years.

The girl and Miko were the best of friends.
They were always together, and always would be.
Or so they thought, until one day Miko was sucked into a time warp.

Miko had left the girl.
She'd gone away to the far, far future.

"There's something I want to tell you tomorrow."
Miko had told her that just yesterday, and yet she left her without a word.

The girl was very upset, but as she ate macarons, she wondered if she might try living a thousand years.

She was told it was some sort of time machine malfunction, but it was all gibberish to the macaron-loving fairy-tale girl.
When she asked where exactly Miko had gone:

"Hmm, maybe about 1000 years from now..."
This reply did not change the carefree girl's feelings, however.
She figured she would be able to do something.

It was just a gut feeling, but...
She had no basis, but...

And so the girl became a test subject for a certain organization.
It was an experiment involving iPS cells, and doing this and that with telomeres.
She didn't understand it, of course, and she made no attempt to.
All she knew was she had to hold off on her daily macarons for a short time.

Praying deep down that she would confront Miko 1000 years from now, she downed the medicine.
Being a girl of good fortune, she promptly became immortal.

She made seven or so friends at the testing facility.
This was because she was quite beautiful, and her nearly-transparent long blonde hair was very pretty.
But she had never talked much with anyone except Miko, so she hadn't had any friends.

Thus, even if she didn't show it, she was very happy to make friends.
So happy, that she did a little dance in her room.

The facility was just like a manga cafe.
You were free to do anything and eat as much Pocky as you wanted.

However, her friends were dying at a rate of one every three days.
This made her feel a little downhearted.
She would take it out by kicking the staff in the backs of their thighs.
They got angry at her, but she kept kicking, a minimum of twenty times.
Kick kick kick.

"There's not much that can be done. Everyone here knows what they're getting into."
"I see... I guess you're right."
"Yes, so please stop constantly kicking us in the thighs."

After a staff member told her this, she decided it was time to give up.
In fact, she had never really listened to what they told her before, and thus never really agreed to be part of anything.

So she fled the facility.

She was able to escape more easily than expected.
She simply leapt out a window and ran away.

No one seemed to be calling for her from behind, so she felt that running wasn't worth it.
Thus, she continued to a nearby town at a brisk pace instead.
She learned from this that even if a girl is immortal, walking at a brisk pace for seven hours still hurts.

Once at a town, she went fishing through trash cans on the road.
An immortal girl still gets hungry.
While she wouldn't die from starvation, eating tasty food would make her happy.
So food was indispensable for her happiness.

The people who passed her by were all very surprised.
This was due to the sight of a pretty young blonde girl rummaging through trash cans with a great smile on her face.
Upon seeing such an extraordinary scene before them, everyone pretended not to look.

"Why are you rummaging through the trash?"
A curious old man appeared asking this question three days later.

"I can't die, but I feel like I'm going to when I'm hungry, so I'm looking for food."
"I don't quite understand, but I suppose I get the gist of it."

The bewildered old man happened to have a macaron on hand, which he gave to the girl.

"Can I really have this?"
"Of course. You're on the verge of death, right?"
"I'm definitely not going to die, but thank you very much. Hooray!"

The girl came along to the old man's house.
There, she ate two more macarons.

Upon returning home, the old man offered a macaron to a small Shinto shrine.
"My daughter loved them, you know..."
The old man looked sorrowful as he gazed at a picture of her.
The girl could tell he was terribly lonely, so she couldn't help but stroke his head.

"Life always has good things in store. Keep at it!"
"Keep at it, hm? Yes, I will."

The old man remarked that it felt as if his daughter had been revived.
But it only made the girl anxious with the thought that Miko might have died in the future.

"Anywhere you're trying to get to?"
"I have to go a thousand years in the future."
"A thousand years? That won't be easy."
"You don't believe me, do you? I'm sure you don't. Believe it!"
"I understand. I believe you."
"So then, how does waiting here a thousand years sound?"
"Ooh, that's a good plan!"
"It is, isn't it?"
"Thank you very much!"
"No, I should be thanking you."
"Oh, all right... I'll let you thank me."

The old man bought her macarons every day.
The girl had nothing in particular to do, and thus felt she had too much time on her hands.
"You're bored, huh?"
This comment made her slightly angry.

"I watch the ants in the park, and I count pebbles in the sand pit all the time!"
She said this as she stared absent-mindedly into the colorfully-gleaming sky.
In any case, she had lots of time to spare.

At times, the old man would convulsively burst into tears.
The girl would stroke his head softly whenever it happened.

Why did your daughter die? What do you do for a living?
Where's your wife? Do you have any friends?
She never once asked these things, yet it never crossed her mind then that she should ask them, or that she should talk to him more.

She lived with the old man in this way for seven years and thirty-one days.
He became sick on the twelfth day of the seventh year, and died on the thirty-first.
The disease was highly contagious, so everyone in town died as well.
But the girl was immortal, so she survived.

Alas, she survived him.

There was no one left in the town.
Alone there, she held a funeral for the old man.
The wind felt strangely cold, and the sky seemed to have lost all color.

Looking into the sky, she ate the last macaron the old man had bought for her.
That macaron was as delicious as always, as had been every one since they first met, and so she cried.

She finished the macaron, wiped her tears, and walked on ahead.

She kept on walking.
Through endless wastelands.
Through glittering coastlines.
Between swaying trees.
Between towering buildings.
Over the horizons of land.
Over the horizons of sea.
She continued to walk.

On, and on.

Over a hundred years passed as she walked.
The country of China perished while she was walking.
It caused much confusion around the world, but it had nothing to do with her.

After two hundred years, she returned to the facility of that certain organization, but no trace of it remained.
In its place was a sky bus terminal, and so she boarded one for the first time.

The girl rode the automatic sky bus as it went on leisurely.
She then suddenly stood up and hopped out the window.

The wind whipped at her skin, and the ground grew before her.
She no longer knew anyone in this wide world she saw from above.
The world was always so large, and her always alone.

I wonder if Miko is doing well?

This thought suddenly crossed her mind as she dove into a lake.

In the year 2300, global warming caused Okinawa to sink into the sea.
There were significantly less people, however, so it seemingly wasn't much of an issue.

The girl enjoyed sea bathing, so this greatly pleased her.
She swam in the sea about twenty-six times in seven days.
She didn't like digital swimsuits, so she swam in the nude.

In the span of 100 years - during which the girl swam every day - two-sevenths of Earth's landmass vanished into the sea.
People felt as if it were the end of the world. Suicide rates surpassed 10 million deaths yearly.

In this world filled with an air of despair, the girl continued sea bathing.
Her skin was tanned light brown, and she became very healthy.
She spent entire days doing butterfly stroke, and completely mastered it.

"Hooray for global warming!"
She shouted this as she swam alone.

One day, a small meteorite crashed into Earth.
It landed right next to the beach the girl swam at, with a staggering impact which would have instantly killed anyone else.
But the girl was immortal, so she was fine.

Startled nonetheless, the girl approached the meteorite.
She saw strange white marshmallow-like creatures chirping on it.
She took them to the shore and fed them wheat flour, and then happily ate it up.

What is this? WHAT is THIS?

The girl named these creatures Schwarz Kugel Shrivers.
She would feed them wheat flour or sometimes guimauve every single day.

While global warming was bringing an end to the world, the girl spent her days playing with and feeding the Schwarzies.
They were perfectly carefree.

As a result of being fed wheat flour, the Schwarzies multiplied to a total of one hundred fifty.
The girl could only admire this, but saw that it would eventually get out of hand.
So she went to find a home for the Schwarzies.
If they multiplied too much more, she wouldn't have enough to give them.

"Sorry... I'm just doing butterfly stroke..."

Muttering this to herself, she continued her vacation life.
She had no motivation to better herself.

"I'm sorry, Schwarzies #1 to #150, but I'm doing this for my own sake..."
And so the girl sent Schwarz Kugel Shriver #1 to #150 off to a kind person's home, with instructions to feed them lots of wheat flour.

The Schwarzies chirped at her sadly.

Three years afterward, it was discovered that the Schwarzies were a dream organism that inhaled carbon dioxide and exhaled oxygen.
Five years after that, a worldwide measure was taken to systematically increase their numbers.
The Schwarzies absorbed the world's carbon dioxide and lowered the atmospheric temperature instantly.

The researcher to whom the girl sent the Schwarzies was recognized as a savior of the world.
He was awarded a Nobel Peace Prize and one billion yen, but she didn't know that.

The Schwarzies were called gods and were loved throughout the world.

Would this not work with plants?
Sorry for butting into the story...

^ Sorry to digress, but...
The amount of carbon dioxide a single tree absorbs is one-thirteenth the amount a person breathes out.
One-five-hundredth what an ordinary car puts out.
And one-fifteen-hundredth what an ordinary household puts out.
So it's an incredibly minuscule amount.

All kinds of problems were resolved, and the world became peaceful.
By the time the temperature had dropped enough that the sea was too cold for the girl, ending her 200 years of vacationing, very little on Earth remained unexplained.

The origin of Earth, the secrets of life, and the mysteries of the deep sea had all been made clear.

Dreaming of unknown worlds, scientists turned their attention to space research.
There was a space development boom.

Just like people long ago had longed to be professional baseball players, people longed to be space researchers.
Amid this, the girl became friends with some boys playing dodgeball in the park.
With much time on her hands and an impossibly strong back from swimming, she spent her days trouncing the helpless children.
For whatever reason, however, she became popular among the boys.

The one who adored the girl most dearly was a short boy with glasses who offered her macarons.
He was weak and teased for not being good at dodgeball.
Unlike the others, he longed to be a space researcher.

The boy called the girl "Master."
Blonde-haired fairy-tale girl though she was, "Master" was something she had not been called before, and it made her feel good.
She told him:

"If you want to be my pupil, bring me macarons every month!"
And so she was supplied macarons every month.
The helpless boy gladly offered tribute to her.

She was a wicked girl. An adored, 650-year-old wicked girl.

"Master! How can one become so good at dodgeball?!"
"Hmm... Swimming is good!"
"So I should swim?! Understood! I'll swim every day!"
"Yeah, that should help. Swim 21 hours a day for about 200 years and you'll be great!"
"Amazing, Master! Wow! I'll do my best!"
"Good luck!"
"Thank you very much for your advice!"
"It's fine. Don't forget the macarons next week!"
"Yes! Understood!"

Though he was a stupid boy in some ways, through much hard study, he achieved his dream of being a space researcher.
After ten, even twenty years, the boy still called the girl "Master," and brought her macarons every month.

"You hardly seem to age, Master!"
"I became immortal a long time ago. Cool, huh?"
"Amazing! But of course, Master!"
"Naturally. More praise!"

They had such conversations when they were bored.
One day, she noticed a gray hair on the boy.
She felt somewhat sad, but said nothing.

The boy always had a happy look in his eyes when he talked with the girl.
He was becoming quite old, but to him, she was still looking on from above, always his "Master."

To an observer, their relationship would appear strange.
But it was perfectly natural to them, and they treasured it greatly.

After several decades, space development reached its climax, and little remained in space that humanity did not know.
The natural progression was to see if there was anything outside of space.
Researchers boarded an advanced ship called the White Holli with this goal in mind.
Their voyage went well, and they succeeded in warping outside of the cosmos.

The boy was one of the ones on the ship.

"I'll be gone for five years or so, but when I get back, I'll bring sweets from outside the cosmos!"
The boy, now past the age of retirement, told the girl this before he set out.
She was disappointed, yet excited to think that in five years, she would have 60 months worth of unknown sweets.

"Good luck, and don't push yourself too hard!"
She sent him off enthusiastically.

As all humanity's hearts danced with the prospect of an unknown world, a single message arrived from the White Holli.

"We've discovered happiness."

No further transmissions were ever made.

Scientists worldwide were shocked, and successive exploration parties were sent, but none returned.
Letting curiosity get the better of them, the space researchers all departed for outside the cosmos.
They never set foot on earth again.

No one knows what was outside the cosmos.
No one can say if there was really happiness there.
But the boy would certainly never come back.
The girl waited for him, but even after five years, he never came back to the park.

"As long as my sole pupil is living happily outside the cosmos..."
So she thought. So she hoped.

With all the capable scientists gone, the people of Earth were left quite foolish.
One day, Hawaii suddenly vanished off the map.
The leader of a certain country had been bored and launched a nuclear weapon at it.

People of other countries were enraged, and a world war began.
Most nations perished in a mere three days.
Like a dam bursting, the world swiftly came to an end.

With the world highly radioactive and turned to anarchy, it was basically Fist of the North Star.

Though the girl was immortal, she was terrified and hid away.
If I just hold out a little longer, I'll meet Miko.
Only two hundred more years, right?

Over a span of one hundred years, the population rapidly declined.
The Earth had 37 billion residents at its peak, but only 10 million remained.

Those who had migrated to Mars had completely given up on Earth.
There remained no means of revitalizing the land. It was regarded as a dead planet, desolate from radiation.

Collision with a giant meteorite was what finished it off.
The dust cloud from the impact covered the atmosphere, blocking the sunlight.
The world turned ashen gray.

A world without light.
An ice age came, and all remaining humans on Earth died.
There was absolutely no one, but the girl continued to wait for Miko.
She had to wait until it had been one thousand years.

I need to hear what Miko has to say.
I'll persevere.
As she spoke, blood came out her mouth.

It had been nearly a thousand years since any such damage had come to her.

Of course, she had no reason to know this, but the radiation had worn away at her genes.
At some point, she had become no longer immortal, but just an ordinary macaron-loving fairy-tale girl.

A world of ash.
No color, no light. Everything ruined.
I want to go home soon.
Somewhere. I don't know where.

I'm so tired of it all.
The changing of the world.
Having to say goodbye to people.
I'm so tired.

I've lived more than enough.
I've had an old man give me macarons.
I've traveled the world.
I've had long vacations, I've found strange creatures.
I've had a pupil, and I've seen the world destroyed.
It's enough. Enough.

But, if it's possible...
I want to see Miko, one last time.

That's all I want.

A light appeared in front of her.
It was the first light in that ashen world in decades.
To see such a thing meant the end must have been near.
She thought she was hearing things.
Specifically, a voice she found familiar.
She couldn't see it anymore.
But she knew.

"Long time no see."
"Yes, it has been."
"Have you been well?"
"Very well!"
"I see. That's good."

"Um, I've been wanting to tell you something."

"I'm a lesbian. And I've always loved you."
"I love you, too. As much as I love macarons."

And that was Earth's final day.
In a world without macarons or sweets of any kind, humanity perished happily.

And so was the macaron-loving, carefree, fairy-tale girl's strange, happy story.

That's the end.
If anyone read it, thanks a lot.

Posted August 10th, 2012


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